wow

i do astonish myself sometimes! the capabilities of my english from over two years ago exceeded what i thought i might have written! my new blog introduction has been suprisingly satisfying to read and i'm glad that it was me who wrote it! less so for the success though. for two years it has been since i've felt a need to exert my feelings onto a keyboard. or at least on this page. my livejournal remains occasionally visited though the point of it seems lost now that no-one wants to read it. though the risk of someone very much like me, returning for one quickie update means that i'd probably not be as free on it as here.

i actually stumbled back on myself here because i wanted to create my own sort of style diary. wen my thoughts initially rushed into my head, i managed to arrange them, but now, like i the room i sit in, it is slightly unorganised with a general directory titled 'where stuff probably is near'. back to the point, i wanted a page, or a tag for things that were affordable and stylish to me, and if i had the spare cash, i would purchase. then another set of pages or tags for those that are ridiculously expensive, that will only be purchased by me when i'm rich. that being not too long away ;) (im not touching wood because touching wood sounds wrong and makes no sense. if it were true everyone should just have a piece of wood with them at all times just in case).

there was another page which laid somewhere inbetween but right now my reasoning for it lies under or around my pile of clothes behind me and i can't find it. but having just discussed wesc headphones, i've reasoned out a non-style page. for that which is just lame.

anyways aside from that. i suppose i should use this space for what it was intended. one. there has been no girl. females have flickered in and out of the picture, but girl? no.

i had liked a few, two dancers of the orient in fact. both snatched up though, and neither seemed to want to hint at anything really. interest coming at my direction hasn't been that great. recently had interest from someone taken, who i might be able to learn-to grow-to love, but right now i'm not ready for her. and im feeling stubborn in terms of girls and i'm not really feeling to adjust, or at least for this one. either way. im gunna wait out to see how her current relationship plays out, but im not bothered enough to push it and find out if my 87% guess of success is correct. i would like to get with it, but i don't feel i'd enjoy anything that would lead to more. don't get me wrong, i'd hate to use and abuse, but she sounds amazing in bed, but i don't feel i'd be able to cope with the personality, and i get the feeling that the feelings would go stale quickly..

not much more to comment on there to be honest. thought talking of honesty, thats maybe what i lack in order to gain those things i lack. honesty to myself would clear up my own opinions, and honesty would get me what i want. honesty got me the bigger room.. why can't it get me more?

watching lakeview terrace atm. will come back soon. probably start style blog in a mo.

-nXc